What happened to Beau Biden was, indeed, terrible. But the comparison with the Kabul Thirteen is grotesque. Beau Biden did not die violently, in combat, while serving on the front lines in a foreign land, but of brain cancer, after a long medical struggle, in an American hospital. Beau Biden was a soldier who died too young; but he did not die too young while soldiering. And Joe Biden is not some powerless parent; as a senator he voted to authorize the war, and as president he contrived the plan that led to the failure that led to the bloodbath. At the margin, it is true that President Biden has “some sense, like many of you do, what the families of these brave heroes are feeling today.” But this is also true of anyone in the world who has lost someone they dearly loved. Mercifully, Joe Biden is not a Gold Star parent. Mercifully, Joe Biden does not have any particular insight into the experiences of Gold Star parents. Next time he stands at a podium, it would be appropriate for him to remember that…

And, besides, even if Biden’s experiences were closely relevant to the topic at hand, he would still be obliged to remain silent about them while publicly mourning the slain. The appropriate way to deal with people who are consumed by anguish is to listen quietly and to absorb as much of their pain as possible. It is not to say, “You know, what you’re telling me about yourself actually reminds me quite a lot of me” — especially when you yourself are responsible for the death being grieved over.