Devastating: New KFC "Skinwich" doesn't actually exist

Slow news day reality: It was either this or yet another mosque post. You’re welcome.

The greatest thing about this very inspired goof? It’s way, waaay over the top — note the spelling of the city names at the end of the post — and yet still seems entirely plausible. Would the creators of the Double Down really think to tear the skin off a bunch of chickens, fry it up, then serve it on a bun? And would Americans really eat it?

We all know the answer, don’t we?

For those who longed to sink their teeth into five layers of crispy chicken skin, American cheese and bacon, KFC spokesman Rick Maynard has some bad news. Tonight he confirmed that the Skinwich was “just the result of someone having a little fun online”–which my colleague Kevin Pang also later did by making his own version of the sandwich here.

“While there is nothing like the taste of KFC’s Original Recipe,” Maynard wrote, “the best way to enjoy it is on a piece of KFC Original Recipe chicken.”

In sum: The existence of the Skinwich was so well within the realm of possibility that it required a formal denial from KFC headquarters. It has, my friends, come to this. The silver lining in our dark cloud of heart-ache, though? There’s always a chance that KFC will respond to public salivation over this mouth-wateringly abhorrent idea by making the Skinwich a reality. Wouldn’t be the first time an Internet prank has turned into a real product, either. Remember when ThinkGeek cooked up the ingenious Tauntaun sleeping bag for its April Fools blog? How’d that work out? Via Mediaite, apparently amateur Skinwiches are just as delicious as you’d imagine them to be. (“Your first instinct might be to barf, but this is one amazing sandwich. No sarcasm. No irony.”) And since KFC’s trying to cater to the sort of weight-conscious idiot who wants to eat healthy but insists on doing it at KFC for some reason, they can make good use of the deskinned chicken breasts. Win/win!

Exit question: Is this a hoax too? I honestly can’t tell anymore.