Well, Huh: MSM Suddenly Interested in Playing 'Where's Mitch-O?'

AP Photo/Mariam Zuhaib

I guess we should be relieved and thankful that the media has finally bestirred itself and deigned to notice that one of the, if not THE, most powerful brokers in the United States Senate has kinda been MIA and completely incommunicado for, well... damn near a month.

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Oh, hello, dudes.

Nice of you to join the 'Where's Mitch-O?' (as in 'Where in the hell is Mitch McConnell?') watch party with the rest of us.

In a piece I wrote on the 1st of this month, I shared the (nearly incomprehensible) copy of the 911 call that came from the Kentucky senator's Washington, D.C. home on June 14. It requested paramedics and an Advanced Life Support (ALS) response for an individual who had been found 'unresponsive.'

...paramedics were sent to the Senator's residence near Capitol Hill.

In the weeks since, there has been no communication from the senator himself, and his office insists - when you can get a statement out of them - that everything's 'hunkydory.' 'Best care,' 'working closely with colleagues,' but 'won't be voting.'

Speculation about either the senator's demise or state of suspended animation grew so heated that Snopes tried to dispel them with a fact check, and could come up with nothing more than the, by this time, worn-out statement from the senator's staff. When they reached out to that staff for independent confirmation, they got 'let's circle back to the statement.'

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...I mean, it's so bad that Snopes is fact-checking 'Is he dead yet?' rumors, and they have nothing to run with.

...It was not possible to independently verify McConnell's health status. On June 30, a member of his team said via email that the Kentucky senator was recovering and still working closely with his staff. Until we know more, we will keep this claim unrated.

In an email regarding McConnell's health, spokesperson Stephanie Penn directed us to a statement from June 24, ahead of the Senate gaveling out of session, that read: "Senator McConnell is still working closely with staff on Senate business and Kentucky matters as he continues his recovery. However, he will not be voting this week."

Penn did not have any more updates on his health, as of this writing.

REALLY?

CNBC finally stuck their professional noses into the vacuum that is information, and guess what all that network firepower came up with.

Questions surrounding Sen. Mitch McConnell, R-Ky., mount as the 84-year-old lawmaker remains hospitalized for more than three weeks with scant details disclosed about his health status.

McConnell, the former longtime Senate majority leader who declined to seek an eighth term following a series of health scares, was admitted to the hospital on June 14, news outlets reported.

A spokesman for the senator at the time confirmed the hospitalization and said he “is receiving excellent care,” but gave no other information, news outlets reported.

Asked by CNBC on Tuesday for the latest available information about McConnell’s health, the senator’s office provided the same brief statement it released last week, saying the senator “appreciates the outpouring of support he’s receiving while he continues his recovery in the hospital.”

“The Senator continues to improve, and is working closely with his staff on Kentucky and Senate matters while the Senate is out of session,” that statement read, suggesting McConnell is lucid, active and recovering.

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A 'statement' suggesting (doing a lot of heavy lifting there) that McConnell was the best McConnell ever, now go about your business. Any further questions, please refer to 'the statement.'

In the meantime, as the great stall continues, we've learned a few more nuggets that fill out an already intriguing picture.

For one thing, many are postulating, based on what they've heard and interpreted, that the reason for the 911 call was a case of cardiac arrest.

...Audio of emergency services calls, first reported by journalist Desiree Townsend and later obtained by other news outlets, indicated responders performing CPR on a person experiencing cardiac arrest at McConnell’s Washington address on the day of his hospitalization. McConnell’s name is not mentioned in the audio. The senator’s office has declined to comment about the recordings.

People are also now giving Senate Majority Leader John Thune the side eye (as if they weren't already *spits*) for what is beginning to look like the teensiest bit of a Biden-era dodge.

On June 16, two days after the 911 call, Thune sat for an interview with Fox's Brett Baier, who asked him if he had any word on the senior Republican's condition after the scary phone call.

Oh, said Thune, I've spoken to him.

He's peachy.

VERY DIALED IN AND INDICATED HE'D BE BACK SOON

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It makes you wonder if that's a 'be back soon' for #realz or a 'be back soon' like Joe Biden was 'sharp.'

There's also the matter of his wife, the former secretary of both Transportation and Labor, Elaine Chao, having taken off for China for meetings there a few days before her aging, frail husband is whisked off to a hospital he's yet to emerge from. And she didn't come back when he was hospitalized.

I believe she just returned a couple of days ago.

I guess to each his own, but...man.

So much weirdness.

Reportedly, John Barrasso had what an aide described as a long enough conversation to infer that McConnell's on his game.

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...Barrasso, the chamber’s majority whip, had a roughly 20-minute conversation earlier Tuesday afternoon, spokeswoman Kate Noyes told CNBC in a statement. “They caught up about the latest news impacting Senate races, the Graham Platner scandal, and the recent Supreme Court ruling on coordinated spending limits,” Noyes said. “They also discussed the Senate’s July work period, including the need to pass the NDAA and confirm President Trump’s nominee for Director of National Intelligence.”

Of course they did.

The one person attesting to proof of life whom I would believe in all of this, conservative commentator Scott Jennings, said he spoke with the former majority leader personally over the phone this morning.

...We talked for just shy of 20 minutes … about IRAN, UKRAINE, the unfolding situation in MAINE, my visit to the TR Presidential Library, and even a little bit of Senate history. I told him we want to see him back at work as soon as possible.

It still leaves many questions and an uncomfortable situation that the McConnell staff could easily resolve with timely updates. 

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Jennings says they 'talked.'

But even if the updates stay basically the same, get someone out there.

I'm not getting the warm fuzzies from these fill-in-the-blank testimonials, either, although admittedly, this one takes the cake for being is totally whack and just a little creepy.

...Just like always he let me do all of the talking. He's a great listener. After that we prayed silently for awhile and had a staring contest.  Just like always, he beat me. I told him we want to see him back at work as soon as possible.

YOICKS

Somebody needs to keep that Kimble guy off of McConnell's social media feed if that's the impression they're trying to make, because that old boy just planted precisely the opposite picture.

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