Hey — if you gave gifts as crappy as the ones this guy gives, you’d be left off a lot of invite lists too. It’s bad enough that his grand gesture to the queen last year was an iPod, but imagine her horror when she booted it up and saw what was on it.

Frankly, I’m surprised they haven’t sent our ambassador home yet.

Because Prince William is not yet heir to the throne, his wedding to Kate Middleton is not classed as a ‘state occasion’ – and the couple feel under no pressure to fill the 2,000-strong guest list with heads of state, the Mail understands.

They are more eager to ask ordinary citizens and charity workers than foreign dignitaries and VIPs to what will be the first royal ‘people’s wedding’, courtiers suggested.

A handful of heads of state are likely to be invited in line with previous royal weddings, possibly including France’s President Nicolas Sarkozy and his wife Carla Bruni…

A senior courtier said: ‘It is certainly not the case that all foreign heads of state will be excluded. The guest list is still being drawn up and could change, but as things stand it’s right (to say Mr Obama will not be invited).’

Oddly enough, this snub made me appreciate just how much The One has in common with the average joe. Think about it: His co-workers are pains in the ass; he comes home after a long day and gets nagged by his wife for not eating right; he goes outside and has to pick dog crap up off of his lawn; and now he has to deal with awkward, petty social snubs inside his circle of “friends.” He really is just like us.

Exit question: Deliberate omission by the royal family aimed at repaying Obama’s chilliness towards the UK, or simple pragmatism aimed at keeping this mega clusterfark of security concerns surrounding the wedding from becoming a super ultra mega clusterfark? Or could there be … another explanation?