Newest cause of global warming: Fatties

Two possible solutions: Rationing food or extermination, which makes sense given the warnings about cannibalism and reproduction taxes if we don’t get our carbon output under control.

If we can figure out a recipe for soylent green, we can solve this whole problem. Dibs on the 200-pounders.

Each fat person is said to be responsible for emitting a tonne more of climate-warming carbon dioxide per year than a thin one.

It means an extra BILLION TONNES of CO2 a year is created, according to World Health Organisation estimates of overweight people.

The scientists say providing extra grub for them to guzzle adds to carbon emissions that heat up the world, melting polar ice caps, raising sea levels and killing rain forests.

The environmental impact of fat humans is made even worse because they are more likely to travel by car — another major cause of carbon emissions.

Solution: Kill them, let animals feast upon their carcasses, then let humans feast upon the animals, yes? What could go wrong, Darwinists?