“Star Wars: The Last Jedi” is a bad movie. It is not a bad Star Wars movie, but objectively speaking, as a film, it’s a bad movie. Not only that, it is an egregiously bad movie: Poorly written, badly directed, lazily acted, and bombastically grating in both sound and image. It is, put bluntly, the worst Star Wars film since George Lucas’ own unfortunate prequels.

To be fair, to hold this opinion places a person in something like a minority of one. The critics have been, by and large, rapturous, with Peter Travers of Rolling Stone exemplifying the critical consensus by saying the film is “simply stupendous, a volcano of creative ideas in full eruption.”

There are, of course, two possible explanations for this: The critics are stupid or have been paid off by Walt Disney’s dark lords. These appear to be the only solutions to the problem, because “The Last Jedi” is not simply bad, it is incompetent on the most basic level.