Venezuelan Gang Wiped Out After Attempting To Take Over Buc-ee's

The violent criminals were soon put in their place when they marched on a Buc-ee's, guns blazing, only to find themselves greeted by a world-class force of polite employees, roasted nuts, savory pulled pork, delicious fudge, and heavily armed Texans.

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"They never knew what hit them," recalled Shawn Erickson, who had stopped at the Buc-ee's and saw the entire shootout. "They rolled up and tried to start pushing people around and take control of the place. The lead guy barely got half of his first sentence out of his mouth before somebody smoked him. I'm not sure what they expected. This isn't Denver. All of the customers and half of the employees were armed."

Ed Morrissey

That ain't satire, either. Don't mess with Texas, and don't f*** with the Buc. 

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