I Didn't Have Hyper-Sexual STD-Ridden Zombie Cicadas on My Media Panic P*rn Card for 2024

A creepy sexually transmitted fungus is expected to morph millions of cicadas into hyper-horny “zombies” by hijacking their bodies so they’ll spread the infection in parts of the US this spring, according to scientists.

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The horror-movie style fungal pathogen, known as Massospora cicadina, will cause the insects mate like crazy in parts of the Southeast and Midwest — as record numbers of the noisy bugs emerge from the ground, an expert told CBS News.


Ed Morrissey

Will Fauci develop a vaccine for everyone to take? Will we all need mail-in ballots to avoid the STDs? 

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