Michelle Wax, a Boston dating coach who provides relationship counseling for an $899 to $1,600 monthly fee, says she has long urged clients to limit alcohol intake on dates. “You can really fool yourself into thinking a date was fun when really you were just drunk,” she says.

She calls this moment the first time so many of her clients have specifically mentioned wanting to meet up without booze. She often suggests picking an activity that her client already does regularly, or has long wanted to try. “That way, even if you don’t hit it off with the person, you’re going to have a great time no matter what,” she says.

Chicago dating coach Stef Safran says social norms around drinking on dates have changed. “A few years ago, if I said I’m going to meet someone at a picnic, I would say, ‘Oh, they’re cheap. That’s crazy.’”

She says her clients are more health-conscious after 2½ years of the pandemic, and more concerned about safety. They are worried about facing sexual pressure, she says, or having a date slip something in their drink while they’re not looking. She also says not drinking helps her clients ensure they won’t do anything they’d regret in the morning.