Dear Matt,

Who do you think would win in a fight between Roy Moore and the truth?

Brent,
Tuscaloosa

That’s a hard one. Though Roy Moore is now 70 years old, he used to train under a renowned kickboxing instructor in Texas, and if accounts hold true, he’s proven to be a formidable grappler, especially if you’re a teenage girl trying to wrestle your way out of his car.

The truth is quite a bit older than Moore, and has lately seemed the worse for wear. In days of yore, my money would be on the truth. It has a storied history. It has always been a bruiser, able to slap all comers in its dojo into submission holds. It used to have distinguished adherents like Thomas Jefferson (“Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom”) and Keats (“Beauty is truth, truth, beauty—that is all ye know on earth, and all ye need to know”).