“You’re not invited” alerts are the latest trend for those brides and grooms who feel a need to confirm non-attendance. With some couples looking for more budget-friendly receptions (i.e., smaller guest lists) and social media serving as wedding announcements on steroids, some feel a need to let non-essential pals know they’ll be sitting this one out.

“Nine out of 10 times, it’s because of lack of space – and the couple feels super guilty,” Tatiana Byron, founder of event planning service The Wedding Salon, told TODAY.com. “These are usually people they’re friendly with, but not close to.”

Tatiana’s clients have done everything from personally e-mailing and sending cards to acquaintances to having their wedding planner do the dirty work for them – call and apologize on the couple’s behalf. The response? An unsurprising mix of disappointment and anger.