Oh, no! A weakly-worded memo from the Security Council!

We laughed in Team America when Hans Blix threatened Kim Jong-Il with a strongly-worded memo, but who knew then that life would not just imitate satire, but satirize satire? Susan Rice tried to spin an agreement with the UN Security Council to kinda-sorta-maybe condemn North Korea’s launch of a Taepodong-2 missile eight days after Kim shot it over Japan as a show of strength, but not even the BBC is buying that line:

Key UN countries have agreed a draft statement condemning North Korea’s rocket launch, diplomats say.

The text, agreed by the Security Council’s five permanent members and Japan, said that the launch had contravened a UN resolution.

The statement is considered a weaker response than the resolution initially sought by Japan and the US.

So where’s the “strong message” Rice promises?

Japan and the US did not get the resolution they sought – but they did get a consensus that the launch violated resolution 1718, something China and Russia had initially been reluctant to set out.

Let’s put this in perspective, shall we? The big victory Rice proclaims is that the UNSC will finally acknowledge that Kim broke one of their own resolutions. Wow. That ought to really shake Kim to his core! Maybe in a month, we can get the UNSC to actually say that breaking resolutions is a bad thing.

Rice can sell this as a victory for the Obama administration, but all they’ve done is demonstrate the uselessness of the UN to maintain security at all. It takes almost an act of God to get the UN to admit that a member nation broke the rules? It takes eight days just to schedule a vote — which still may not pass — to get the Security Council to defend its own resolutions? Who knew that the Obama administration would make Hans Blix look like a pillar of strength?