Some stories are just so wrong that they are funny. This is one of those stories. Walmart has issued an apology for a third-party’s item listed for sale on its Canadian website. That item is a sweater with the design of Santa sitting with cocaine in front of him. Santa is pantless, too.
Oh, Canada. The wording on the sweater is “Let it snow”. Clever but not appropriate for a Christmas sweater. Walmart is doing damage control now.
“These sweaters, sold by a third-party seller on Walmart.ca, do not represent Walmart’s values and have no place on our website,” a spokesperson told the outlet.” We have removed these products from our marketplace. We apologize for any unintended offense this may have caused.”
Walmart apologizes for sweaters featuring Santa with cocaine, pants off https://t.co/pW4wQOeAjK
— MarketWatch (@MarketWatch) December 9, 2019
The product description played heavily on the “snow” slang for cocaine.
“We all know how snow works. It’s white, powdery and the best snow comes straight from South America,” the description read. “That’s bad news for jolly old St. Nick, who lives far away in the North Pole. That’s why Santa really likes to savor the moment when he gets his hands on some quality, grade A, Colombian snow.”
Fortunately, since apparently Cocaine Santa is not wearing pants, there was no reference to another common nickname of cocaine – “blow”. Yikes! Other choices from this third-party seller include sweater designs of Santa in compromising positions, pantless, including one “roasting his “chestnuts” — in front of a fireplace”. Yes, the jokes write themselves. There was even a sweater of ‘naughty’ Santa getting whipped by a white-haired dominatrix in red, presumably Mrs. Claus, which isn’t something anyone needs.
This silly story is some much-needed levity with all the screaming and yelling over Impeachmentpalooza. It is also a better story than that of the Holocaust-themed Christmas ornaments. Earlier this month, Amazon scrambled to remove ornaments depicting a Nazi concentration camp. The Auschwitz Memorial alerted the company in a tweet.
The move followed a tweet from Poland’s Auschwitz Memorial calling on the retailer to remove the “disturbing and disrespectful” merchandise.
It included Christmas tree decorations, a bottle opener and a mouse-pad.
All displayed scenes from the Nazi death camp where mass killing was conducted in World War Two.
The Christmas merchandise featured images from Auschwitz including the railway line leading to its infamous gates, the barbed wire fences and the buildings where it housed victims – mainly Jews.
— Auschwitz Memorial (@AuschwitzMuseum) December 1, 2019
I don’t even know what kind of twisted person comes up with that idea for a line of merchandise.
The Auschwitz Memorial later found similar images to purchase on Amazon, including an “arbeit macht frei” [work sets you free] bath towel. The phrase appeared on the main gates at Auschwitz, where at least 1.1 million people died during World War II.
In a statement at the time, Amazon confirmed: “All sellers must follow our selling guidelines and those who do not will be subject to action, including potential removal of their account.
Amazon says all of the merchandise has been removed.
I can see where the Cocaine Santa could be used as a giveaway in an ugly sweater contest among adults, as a joke. The pantless Santas? Not so much. Some of those designs aren’t meant for public display by anyone outside of a Nevada brothel.
Something we can all be thankful for is a strong economy. Online sales broke records this year during Black Friday sales. Consumer confidence levels remain high and solid holiday spending is predicted. It’s all good news and a welcome break from Impeachmentpalooza. It’s more fun to replace “Bah, humbug” with “Ho, ho, ho”, just not “Ho, ho, snow!”.
I’ll end with a holiday ad worth watching. It’s impossible to watch and not smile.