I bet you thought the pride parades all took place in June, didn’t you? Well, at least most of the gay pride parades do. Of course, the various parades for the many nationalities making up the American melting pot are scattered all across the calendar. But there’s a different sort of pride parade coming to Boston and it will take place in the hottest part of the summer. So pack your sunscreen and a cooler full of ice water and get ready for the Straight Pride Parade. Wait a minute… say what now? (CBS Boston)

Organizers of what they’ve dubbed a “Straight Pride” parade say they will be receiving a license from the City of Boston to hold the event on August 31.

Organizers held a press conference on Wednesday outside of City Hall after their public event application was approved. The parade is being put together by a group calling itself “Super Happy Fun America.”

John Hugo said he has been told the group will be able to hold the event on August 31.

This event is being organized by a group going by the name Super Happy Fun America. (Their tag line is, “It’s Great to be Straight.”) Their president (and parade organizer), John Hugo, is quoted on their website as saying, “Straight people are an oppressed majority. We will fight for the right of straights everywhere to express pride in themselves without fear of judgment and hate. The day will come when straights will finally be included as equals among all of the other orientations.”

So… okay then. Good to see somebody finally standing up for the oppressed majority. I, for one, haven’t forgotten the bad old days back in the sixties and seventies when the gays were hunting down straight men in the streets, getting them fired from the jobs and cheering on the police as they beat any straight men they found with batons. (/sarcasm)

Look, I understand that there is more than a little simmering resentment out there regarding the antics of the social justice warriors. And I have no doubt that there are people who still disapprove of gay marriage being legalized on religious grounds. (Let’s be honest here. There are also some people who just hate gays.) But do you really think the heterosexuals are being “oppressed?”

I suppose there’s no reason you can’t be proud of being straight, white, male or whatever else you like. Heck, everyone else has some sort of pride organization. But that really only scores points if you’re earnestly doing it to express pride in your group and not as a clandestine maneuver to foster hatred against someone else.

More than anything else, this event has the appearance of an intentional excuse to look for a confrontation. For Pete’s sake, you picked Milo Yiannopoulos to be the Grand Marshal. How many people do you really think are going to show up to march for this cause? Odds are very good, much like many other controversial events, the number of liberal protesters you will draw will outnumber the marchers by a factor of hundreds at a minimum. Are you just looking for a fight to break out?

Sorry to dump cold water on your parade (pardon the turn of phrase), but this doesn’t seem like a wise investment of your time. And if someone winds up getting hurt you’re not going to be helping anyone. The Mayor admits that he has to issue the permit you requested and I’m sure the police will be on hand to try to protect you, but still. C’mon, man.