"Walking Dead" grumble thread: Did anything actually happen last night?

They’ve now had 90 minutes of screen time since the cliffhanger at the prison to explain what happened to the group. Here’s what we’ve learned. In 90 minutes.

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1. Carl’s going through puberty.
2. Everyone’s alive, including Carol.
3. There’ll be some new characters next week, if you’re good.

Ninety minutes well spent. Compare the amount of entertainment packed into the same timeframe for an episode of “Sherlock,” say, to what you’ve gotten over the past two weeks from TWD. (I know, it’s easy to be efficient when your season lasts three episodes.) Even last night’s big set piece, the assault on the bus by Maggie, Sasha, and Bob, was the same gimmick they used for Sophia’s reveal at the end of season two. All the zombies are dispatched except one, who’s growling in the shadows. The suspense mounts: Is the mystery zombie someone we know? Not this time. Apparently the Glenn/Maggie love story is too tender, too epic, to end so soon.

I’m not even that interested in Lizzie the bad seed. You knew she wasn’t going to smother Judith. She will, in all likelihood, end up murdering a major character in cold blood, but it won’t be one of the writers’ designated indispensables like Rick or Daryl or even Maggie. It’ll be Tyreese, a mid-major, or Carol. Let’s get on with it. I’m mostly interested in seeing how the show deals with Lizzie once the rest of the gang finds out. Post-apocalyptic justice calls for summary execution of murderers. There’s no way they’re going to do that to a little girl on TV. Are they?

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Now, I need your feedback (and by “you” I mean fans of the comics). The Abraham Ford character isn’t just another variation of the crazed warlord figure that populates this genre, is he? I ask because, from Captain Rhodes in “Day of the Dead” to Major West in “28 Days Later,” you can pretty much guess how things are going to go once men in fatigues show up during the zombie apocalypse. After two seasons of the Governor, I feel like we’ve covered our brutal-megalomaniac bases for awhile. Is that what’s coming next?

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Jazz Shaw 9:20 AM | April 19, 2024
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