Nothing I can say will prepare you for it so I’ll just quote Jonah Goldberg, who wrote the following before this episode of Leno aired, “Even if they all put their heads together, it’s doubtful they could beat a carnival chicken at Tic-Tac-Toe.” Little did he know. Don’t pretend like you don’t know who they are, either. You’re watching the show. We’re all watching the show.

The best part is at the end, but if you can’t wait that long, at least watch to the point where they show the picture of Biden. I’ve long suspected it was true but not until tonight was I certain: China’s total victory is assured.