'Right Now, That Deal Is Worth Toilet Paper, Basically': Flushing Chagos

AP Photo/Ahn Young-joon, File

Things have gone from bad to worse for Prime Minister Keir Starmer after the body blow he took last week, when he initially squeamishly denied both RAF Fairford and our joint base at Diego Garcia in the Chagos Islands.

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For his rank perfidy, Trump blasted the deal Starmer's been trying to ram through Parliament to hand the chain over to cozy Chinese buddy Mauritius, basically spiking it for the moment.

As you all are pretty aware of now, Starmer swore by the portraits of every British hero he'd taken out of No. 10 and stuck in storage that the handover of the chain - and massive tens of billions of dollars worth of a payoff for the privilege - would go through.

But the longer he has to wait, the more comes out about what an utter disaster and betrayal it is, not only to the British people and the United States, but also to the beleaguered Chagossians themselves, who have been pretty miserably treated by the British government.

Their elected First Minister, a courageous Mr. Misley Mandarin, took it upon himself to somehow make it all the thousands of miles from Britain out to that God-forsaken archipelago in the middle of the vast Indian Ocean. Starmer then came in for another round of opprobrium and scorn when he, the man who can't keep little boats chock full of illegals motoring over the Channel landing nor deport a single immigrant already in the country, somehow managed to get a threatening letter out to those far-flung islands. It was sent to tell the First Minister he and his compatriots had days to remove themselves from Chagos or face prison.

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The jokes wrote themselves.

As do the sad tales of the continued unraveling of all the excuses the Starmer government has offered for why the deal must go through.

For one thing, it's dragged out long enough that Starmer's Number One Guy in Washington to sell the deal to Trump, former British ambassador to the US, Peter Mandelson, was arrested early this morning (our time) over his ties to?

None other than Jeffrey Epstein.

...Lord Mandelson has been arrested on suspicion of committing misconduct in public office in a fresh blow to Sir Keir Starmer


Lord Mandelson has been arrested on suspicion of committing misconduct in public office in a fresh blow to Sir Keir Starmer.

The former Labour cabinet minister and ally of the Prime Minister was pictured being marched from his London home by plain-clothes police officers on Monday afternoon.

Police launched an investigation into the disgraced peer three weeks ago after it emerged that he appeared to have leaked sensitive government documents to Jeffrey Epstein while serving as business secretary in Gordon Brown’s Cabinet.

Lots of paperwork on this fine specimen of a man.

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This was all news to him. That's Starmer's story, and he's sticking to it.

...Sir Keir has insisted that he did not know about the “depth” of Lord Mandelson’s relationship with Epstein at the time he was appointed, although the details of their friendship had already been published by newspapers and in a report by the investment bank JP Morgan.

What was he telling the Trump administration that turned out to be untrue or exaggeration?

The clock is now ticking on Starmer. Parliament is back from recess, and the Labour government is being peppered with questions on the floor and a growing demand for answers they never provided before.

He also has elections coming up that could mean the end of his time in office.

...Some Labour MPs and government officials suspect Sir Keir will be forced to resign if his party performs poorly in Thursday’s by-election and the local and devolved elections in May.

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The renewed scrutiny on treaties is opening some eyes to the fact that the supposed impetus for the rush is as manufactured as all the rest of Starmer's tortured reasoning.

And that, regardless of what Starmer insists, until such time as a Parliament ratifies the treaty, Britain could walk away at any point, and the agreement Starmer's clinging to so desperately is worth less than toilet paper, no matter what the announced intentions are.

In a delightful twist (and thanks, GlobalTrvlr), the Chagossian First Minister has not yet been carted off the island.

He had a message for Donald Trump and the United States today:

Y'ALL COME ON AND DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO

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...He says: "We, the people of the Chagos Islands, give our blessing for the United States to use the base at Diego Garcia for strikes against the Iranian regime – in defence of the Iranian people."

His full statement:

"Today, I stand not in exile, but on our own soil, as the democratically elected head of government of the Chagos Islands.

Let the world hear this clearly.

We are here.

We govern here.

And we decide what happens here.

For too long, decisions about Diego Garcia were made in distant capitals, without our voice, without our consent. That era is over.

Diego Garcia is not just a military base. It is a pillar of stability in the Indian Ocean. It protects trade routes, deters aggression, and helps preserve global security. These are dangerous times and so I must be absolutely clear ....

If the United States decides that action is needed to defend international order, then as the elected Government of these islands, we give our permission for the use of Diego Garcia in defence of peace, secured through strength.

Once again, to be clear …

We, the people of the Chagos Islands, give our blessing for the United States to use the base at Diego Garcia for strikes against the Iranian regime – in defence of the Iranian people.

This is our sovereign decision.

President Trump understands the strategic importance of this island. He understands that peace is preserved through strength, not hesitation.

To the President of the United States, I say this directly:

You have our partnership.

You have our co-operation.

You have our permission.

We hope this partnership will be mutual.

If our homeland stands as a shield for America and its allies, then America must stand as a shield for our people. We seek formal recognition of our government, binding guarantees of our right of return, and permanent protection of our indigenous lands.

The Chagos Islands will not be a bargaining chip. We will not be spoken for. And we will not be silent. We stand with those who defend stability. We stand with those who defend our common values. We stand with those who stand with us. 

God Bless the United States of America."

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I like the cut of his jib.

'Shared values.'

I sure hope Trump has something to say to him.


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John Sexton 6:00 PM | February 23, 2026
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