This is so classically Panhandle sleazy - I can't stand it.

Now, I will admit to knowing all the players personally, having helped out the GOP locally since McCain's campaign, then ran the county team (which was...me) for Rubio's original guerilla senate campaign and, by the time of Trump's election, social-climbed my way into vice-chair of the county Republican Party. #SmoothOperator

Good times. Kept me busy.

Anyway, Matt Gaetz is my congressman, and what a change from the sober, hardworking, honest af Chumuckla farmer we had for years before him (who was elected after Joe ScrewYourBorough *spits* quit in a fit of pique because W didn't give him the flashy D.C. gig he thought he rated), Jeff Miller - whom we all adored. Just a good, good man.

Matt's daddy, Don is a forever name in Florida politics and at the statehouse, and they're a very well-to-do family in their own right. So when Matt declared for the District One seat left open by Jeff's retirement, we all groaned, because, well...rich punk.

Matt got elected easily - go figure - and off he went to D.C., fame and notoriety. He really has blossomed and there have been a few times I've told hubs he's "grown on me," and I don't mean like a tick. There is no denying the guy is whip-smart, but, like Scarborough before him, damn, does he love a camera and microphone and causing a ruckus every chance he gets, which he doesn't necessarily have to do.

But when he quits showboating and gets down to congressional business, the blood he draws in hearings from the Biden administration has been so gratifying to watch, He has been masterful in his eviscerations.

But if we wince here at the grandstanding in the Panhandle, there are plenty of people who are sharpening knives for Gaetz all over the political world and on both sides of the aisle. Democrats and impressionable suckers poured money last cycle into convicted felon Rebecca Jones' bid to unseat Gaetz. Her spiraling lunacy with its corresponding rants against both Gaetz and our governor were the most entertaining part of the campaign.

This year's a little different. Gaetz has picked up a Republican challenger for the primary, of all things. A guy named Aaron Dimmock is a retired Naval aviator who says he lives here in Pensacola and is trading heavily on that military background in his campaign advertisements. Obnoxiously so, to my mind.

So, I wrote "says" he lives here, because when local Republicans started asking, "Who are you again?" it turns out Mr Dimmock has a few issues, not the first of which is that he actually has a house in Missouri.

Because he works for the Governor of Missouri.

...Those comments came after the St. Louis Dispatch released its own report on Dimmock running in Florida while earning a six-figure annual salary in Missouri. Dimmock told the outlet he worked remotely. Officials told the outlet Dimmock would need to resign his post if he won a seat in Congress.

Missouri records show Dimmock has earned $57,000 year-to-date from the Missouri agency this year. Federal law requires members of Congress to live in the state they represent. Missouri law forbids state employees from seeking partisan elected office.

...“Dimmock lives in Missouri. Dimmock signed a residency pledge in Missouri this year. Then he used a Missouri driver’s license to run for office here,” a narrator states.

Images show property records filed in St. Louis County verifying his residency and Florida Division of Elections records showing he used a Missouri license to verify his identity.

As you can imagine, the county Republican leaders in our area were a little put out about what they started learning.

The word "carpetbagger" springs to mind.

As the lady, whom I am unfamiliar with, says in the video - Dimmock's wife didn't even know what part of Pensacola she was supposed to be living in.

After going through several Dimmock videos, I don't think he's really as familiar with Pensacola or the Panhandle as he claims, himself, because he sure doesn't talk Redneck Riviera talk. It turns out, besides have a six-figure Missouri government job, that Mr Dimmock is something known as a "Radical Candor" coach.

What's that you ask?

Well, it's here on their about page and you can hear it in Mr Dimmock's soothing, dulcet tones.

Although, for someone who's so touchy-feely woke, his friends are sure sending around the Gaetz nasty grams.

Lovely stuff in my mailbox.

And why the Hell did a woke carpetbagger from Missouri who is still employed by that state have a brand-new Pensacola address and decide to challenge Matt Gaetz?

That answer would be "McCarthy." You can add he's a "#BLM supporter," too. 

They aren’t sending their best! pic.twitter.com/mD6NLhODnY

— Matt Gaetz (@mattgaetz) April 29, 2024

The stuff in my mailbox? That American Patriots PAC is a McCarthy-connected operation.

...Dimmock shares a treasurer with American Patriots PAC, a group founded by allies of former House Speaker Kevin McCarthy. McCarthy and Gaetz have been engaged in an intense public feud since Gaetz helped lead an effort to oust McCarthy from the Speakership last year.

...Dimmock made pro-BLM, pro-DEI posts while serving as a director at Chapman & Co., a firm which conducts workplace training. Dimmock shared a Chapman & Co. post that said “#blacklivesmatter,” “we commit to audit every business process to ensure they reflect a culture of inclusion” and “serve non-profits advancing diversity, equity, and inclusion.”

In a 2020 post, Dimmock also said “We remain committed to making it better #leadership #inclusion,” in regards to a post about Black Lives Mater.

I know McCarthy's pissed, but talk about scraping the bottom of the barrel - read the room, buddy.

Dimmock may have out-clevered himself because now he's in some possible legal hot water for taking beaucoup Missouri state bucks while obviously not putting in the required work hours for them. Not to mention, now the MO governor's on the hot seat answering questions about his hired help galivanting all over FL to beat a sitting and popular Congressman.

Missouri taxpayers want to know why they're subsidizing that.

...Ousting Gaetz — who has his problems but is nevertheless quite popular among Republicans in his district — was already going to be a long shot. But at this rate, Dimmock may as well have competed for a spot on the U.S. Olympic team. It seems like his odds of success there are about as good as his odds to win this Primary.

Oh, well done, GOP internecine warfare advocates! Way to waste your money. Explains Congress.

Gaetz is pretty safe unless something goes south in these investigations, and everything's blown up the feds' faces so far on those.

As for the dirty tricks, if it wasn't McCarthy, it's always someone else pulling something up here. Like, our county commissioners are a never-ending source of angst and rage between congressional election frolics.

Three of the four candidates running in the Escambia County Commissioner District 1 race have close ties to incumbent Commissioner Jeff Bergosh and their presence in the race could split the vote in his favor.

Bergosh has never won a majority of votes in the GOP primary for County Commission. Because there is no runoff in the contest, the candidate with the most votes wins, even if it's not a majority. In 2016, Bergosh won with 41% of the vote, as 59% of primary voters went for a choice other than Bergosh. In 2020, he won with only 39% of the vote, as 61% of primary voters chose an alternative.

In the opening of candidate qualifying week on June 10, Bergosh was heading to what may have been his toughest election during his time on the county commission with a head-to-head match against Steve Stroberger in an open Republican primary. Then three people, all with ties to Bergosh, jumped in the race.

Boss Hogg is alive and well.

As I said back when Jones was running against Gaetz, it has to be the crystal sand that calls all the weirdos in. 

Like a homing beacon from space sending the signal out, and they zero right in on us.