Video: Vladimir Putin is awesome at hockey because no one will guard him

It is a truth universally acknowledged that the skill set necessary to be a dictator coincides perfectly with the ability to master every single sport in the world to a degree not attained by one’s fellow countrymen and Olympians even though the time spent quashing dissent and jailing and murdering dissidents can really interfere with one’s training schedule.

There’s the late Kim Jong Il of the 11 holes-in-one and perfect 300.

There’s Idi Amin, who “defeated” his country’s national boxing coach in a suit and tie, surrounded by his own bodyguards. The coach later said he wisely chose to be TKO’ed instead of killed.

There’s, well, Vladimir Putin of hunting, archeological discovery, and tiger-taming prowess.

Now, Putin is at it again, scoring a remarkable six goals and five assists in an exhibition game against with hockey greats in Russia. One can perhaps gauge Putin’s inflated territorial aspirations by the gall of his fake hockey exploits. In 2012, Putin’s fake hockey box score was only two goals and one assist. He is emboldened!

Watch the tape, particularly the first goal, which requires a defenseman to turn away from the shooter to allow the leader his path to the goal.

SBNation has a different version of the video, here.

Heh, via Huffington Post:

While hockey is a notoriously physical sport, no one so much as laid a finger on the Russian president during the match, at least in the clips released online.