In China, rural funerals are something to die for

Well, it’s about time that Chinese authorities crack down on strip tease acts during funerals.

Wait! What?

It seems communist China’s ruling party has had quite enough of young women uncovering their bodies in seductive fashion while the family of a deceased is burying a beloved departed one.

Especially in rural areas, in China it’s a matter of family honor that as many people as possible attend a dead member’s funeral. The more people, the more respect and honor.

For what in China seems obvious reasons to guarantee larger crowds, families have taken to hiring strip tease acts, often at great financial cost.

This tradition seems to have occurred more often in China’s countryside where, let’s face it, not a whole lot else is going on besides the sounds of rice growing. So, why not give an otherwise sad occasion a happy ending?

You need not be a grieving family member to attend. Unrelated females slowly disrobing definitely increased attendance. The crowd’s the thing, see? And a big one showed off a family’s wealth and importance.

Photographs are generally prohibited. But some domestic news accounts reported alcohol-fueled funerals turning into rather raucous events with yelling obscenities, cheering and strippers performing “obscene, pornographic and vulgar performances” together onstage.

If a crowd became particularly appreciative, dancing strippers might even move through the audience frisking male members.

Authorities of the Ministry of Culture in Beijing have attempted to end the bawdy practice several times before, most recently in 2015. Wedding crowds were also enhanced by stripper. The government even set up hot lines in 19 cities for citizens to report the debauchery in return for rewards. Good luck with that.

Only in the interests of cross-cultural understanding, mind you, some American communities might perhaps want to experiment with such events:

“At 2 p.m. Saturday next our departed Richard will be interred at Highlow Cemetery. Please join us honoring him at a reception to follow at the Elks Lodge with beer/wine, chips and dueling strippers on dual stages.” You’d probably attract a quite honorable crowd.