Imagine your brain on sports. It is not a pretty picture. The most wondrous thing in the universe is the human brain, and for decades yours has devoted much (most, to be honest) of its bandwidth to games. Now you are suffering something akin to delirium tremens. The agonies you are going through during this withdrawal are evidence that spectatorship is addictive. During baseball’s regular season you overdose on 2,430 games, your synapses firing away, sending pleasure pulses through you. But now, with the suddenness of a walk-off home run, all sports, and the firing, have stopped.

And you find yourself mystified by your surroundings, which you last really noticed when you were about 7. Now you resemble the man who in mid-March posted this: “Day 3 without sports. Found a lady sitting on my couch yesterday. Apparently she’s my wife. She seems nice.”