But this is what happens when you follow politics like it’s a form of entertainment. If the rules of normal politics applied, there would be countless compromises available. And, if one is going to be objective, Trump has offered quite a few. He’s not asking for the full price tag. He has said he’s willing to make it more of a super-fence than the Mexico-paid-for concrete behemoth he promised on the campaign trail.

There are other compromises most Republicans and Democrats could accept. Legalization for the “Dreamers” in exchange for a couple billion dollars in fencing would have been considered a huge win by liberals even a year ago. If Trump were willing to forgo the wall in exchange for enhanced E-verify and reforms to the legal-immigration system, conservative immigration experts would cheer, at least in private.

But if you follow these things like it’s a movie, none of that works. If Humphrey Bogart and Peter Lorre agreed to split ownership of the Maltese Falcon at the end of the movie, no one would leave the theaters happy.