Facebook dead at 12, a victim of 2016

If I were to write an obituary for Facebook, it might look something like this:

Facebook, The, 12, of Boston died in the early months of 2017, after a long illness stemming from the 2016 election cycle. Born of Mark Zuckerberg, survived by Instagram. In lieu of flowers, please click on an ad on the Facebook sidebar while you check messenger every now and then.

The Facebook, known as Facebook or FB for short, was invented as a tool to connect users with friends, family, and occasionally brands. The social network became a death knell for high school reunions, as we no longer had to schlep back to our hometown to see how fat the star football player had gotten, or how successful the school nerd had become. We use the service to connect with old classmates, coworkers, and neighborhood friends.