Rejoice! For the They / Thems have risen. After being legally crucified by the Supreme Court last Wednesday, the trans faithful marched from Parliament Square in London yesterday in a display of devotion and defiance. It was a tantrum disguised as a protest over the court’s heresy – that the word ‘woman’ refers to a biological category, not a personal sense of gender.

Chanting ‘Fuck JK Rowling’ and ‘Fuck Wes Streeting’, the mob wailed over the apparent injustice of women having legally defined boundaries. Banners held included ‘The only good TERF is a dead one’; as legal commentator Dennis Kavanagh pointed out, there are currently people in prison for saying less.

Somewhere along the route, the statue of women’s rights campaigner Millicent Fawcett was defaced with ‘Fag Rights’. Ahead of the march, former TV presenter India Willoughby urged people to engage in a synchronised #PeeForMe piss protest – because nothing says dignity and equality quite like public urination.

The faithful finally gathered at St James’s Park to hear the gender gospel delivered by omnicause preachers draped in trans flags and keffiyehs.