Women have penises. Men can grow cervixes. Babies aren’t born with a biological sex. Show me a bats**t take on transgenderism and I’ll show you a high-profile Labour Party figure who has gladly spouted it. Like those Thai cave boys a few years ago, Keir Starmer and his mob became so lost down the gender rabbit hole they needed some external miracle to break them free.

Well now they’ve got it. The landmark Supreme Court ruling yesterday is surely Labour’s opportunity to slowly back away from the crime scene. In a unanimous decision, the court found that sex in UK equality law means, well, sex. If you’re a man you’re a man, if you’re a woman you’re a woman, if you’re a lesbian you shouldn’t be expected to treat Belinda – with his beard and his balls – as one of your own. Sex is not a feeling, nor a matter of having the right paperwork. Otherwise, sex-based rights cannot exist. It couldn’t be clearer.

The initial noises from His Majesty’s Government are simultaneously encouraging and hard to take seriously. Minister for women and equalities Bridget Phillipson has suddenly remembered the w-word in her title. ‘We have always supported the protection of single-sex spaces based on biological sex’, she says, with a straight face. This is the same Bridget Phillipson who said transwomen in possession of a penis are legally entitled to use the women’s loos. That wasn’t even a year ago.

I suppose you can’t blame her entirely for the confusion. Her boss spent the best part of five years publicly wrestling with what you might call The Penis Question, before he was elected prime minister and journalists felt compelled to ask him other, less humiliating questions. In the end, he famously settled on 99.9 per cent of women not having a penis. Which would still mean tens of thousands of female penises out there in the wild.