There is a predator out there seeking to do harm to women. He’s known as the “male feminist.”

It’s constantly happening that men who loudly proclaim to be feminists end up being exposed as sexual predators, but is every man who purports to be a feminist a sexual predator? Yes. Absolutely. All normal men think feminism is dumb, so the only men who would pretend to like it are devious and up to no good.

That’s why if a man ever comes up to you and expresses respect for women, you have to realize you are in immediate danger and MUST ACT NOW.

But don’t worry. I like women (but in a patronizing way — not a feminist way) and so have made this guide to help protect you from all the male feminists out there.