New Poll Shows Dead Heat Between 'Uncommitted' and 'None Of These'

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Excerpt Babylon Bee babylonbee.com

According to American statistician Nate Silver, the American public hasn't been this divided since the Civil War. However instead of fighting over slavery and states' rights, Silver fears the nation will soon tear itself apart over how much they hate everyone running for president. "People either can't decide because they dislike their options, or have decided for sure that they dislike their options," explained Silver. "It's really going to come down to the wire."

At publishing time, "No Opinion" entered the race as a viable third-party candidate.

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