Jolly old Saint Nick has decided to shake things up this Christmas season by increasing the consequences for naughty children. Instead of lumps of coal, misbehaving kids will find themselves unwrapping something even worse: a copy of The Marvels on Blu-ray.

Parents across the nation are reporting unprecedented levels of cooperation from their little ones, who are suddenly determined to be on their best behavior after Santa’s announcement.

[In fairness, the supply chain for this is much less limited than coal these days …. — Ed]