Dating pool dropouts and doom

While the sexual revolution freed women from depending on men for income or stability, it also means they can privilege more “frivolous” qualities in a mate, says Rob Henderson, a psychology PhD with a Substack on social mores.

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“People used to care a bit more deeply about moral character and hard work, and whether the person was an ethical and upstanding citizen,” he tells me. “And now, you don’t have to worry about that quite as much. And you can sort of focus on things that are just, like, more immediate, like attraction.”

The result? Men at the tip-top of the dating pool get everything. And the men who don’t have it all get nothing.

But even the alphas are feeling the squeeze.

[It’s a depressing read, but very much worth your time. Reingold seems to attribute this more to the socioeconomic advantages that women have gained, an interesting theory but one that doesn’t seem to fit the facts very well. To me, the issue is that values have changed dramatically in courtship (remember that term?). Society as a whole has become indifferent to moral character, hard work, and good citizenship — so why would we expect women to prioritize those qualities? Or men, for that matter? Sex has become increasingly transactional since The Pill, so it’s no surprise that dating has become entirely transactional as well. — Ed]

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