Biden awarded honorary degree for work as honorary president

Joe Biden was recently awarded an honorary doctorate degree from Howard University, a rare honor bestowed upon him just three years after he became Honorary President.

Howard University, named after intellectual and philosopher Howard The Duck, granted the Honorary President the prestigious Honorary Doctorate because of his “unity-based unification” and “popularity among oligarchs and oil tycoons.”

Honorary President Biden was then asked to say a few words whenever he was finished eating his new diploma.