This pathway to romance can be worth the risk. For one thing, couples who started as friends have the pleasant knowledge that they originally spent time together simply because they enjoyed each other’s company, rather than because of the other, more superficial reasons that some people couple up, such as earning power or physical attractiveness.

In fact, a 2015 study found that couples who were friends before dating differed more in their levels of physical attractiveness than couples who weren’t. The researchers speculated that either the friends-first couples fell for each other’s inner qualities instead of their looks, or they became more physically attracted to each other because of those inner qualities. Either way, it’s a lovely story.

Another strength of relationships that start as friendships is that couples have a fuller sense of who their partner is from the beginning. In my experience, this makes the giddy early stages of a relationship even more enjoyable—with my partner, our preexisting bond served as a kind of tailwind that carried us through the sometimes-awkward moments that arise during the first few dates with someone new. Going through that phase with someone I trusted was more fun than going through it with someone I was trying to figure out if I could trust. In fact, the “after” wasn’t all that different from the “before”—just as we had when we were friends, we talked constantly and vulnerably, and frequently texted when we were apart.