Camille, now 18, flashed back to the moment she stumbled out of the building, her hands on the shoulders of the girl in front of her. Her mother soon found her, and began shouting when a TV reporter tried to shove a microphone into Camille’s face.

For years, Camille’s trauma surfaced through debilitating panic attacks. They would hit her during swim practice, because the moment she felt short of breath, her body would unravel. She’d sit on the edge of the pool deck, crying and shaking.

Their freshman year, on the day of the Sandy Hook anniversary, a threat to the elementary school forced students there to evacuate. When Camille found out, she collapsed to the floor in her French class and couldn’t move. She couldn’t see or hear, either. She felt like she was suffocating.

Lately, migraines and nausea have replaced the panic attacks, and Camille suspects she knows why. She’s leaving Newtown, and with it, all the people who understand the day that shaped her. She’s sensed the discomfort that strangers feel when they hear about what she’s been through, and she worries that the people she meets in college will react the same way.