As it happens, many of these same feminists who are silent on Sinema’s violation were protesting all weekend about a woman’s right to privacy when it comes to abortion. Actress Jennifer Lawrence held a sign at one rally that said, “Women can’t be free if they don’t control their bodies.” How can this theory apply to one thing and that one thing only? How can feminists rally on behalf of abortion under the guise of women’s privacy and bodily control one day and be mute when a prominent woman has had her privacy and bodily control violated literally the next day?

This latest news cycle has sent a chilling message to those harmed by sexual crimes — victims like me and, I would argue, like Sinema. It tells us that these violations of our privacy are something we might have coming to us if we dare step a toe out of line, and that our fellow women who deem themselves feminists won’t even raise a whisper in our defense.

Leah Libresco Sargeant pointed out on Twitter why this discomforted many women, myself included: “Look, the reason people (especially women) try to hold the line on small boundaries and taboos is that once a person breaks a small, non-violent rule; you shift your expectations about whether they’re on the cusp of breaking a violent one. Don’t chase people into bathrooms.”