I’m sorry I pretended I was going to release my tax returns. Of course I didn’t pay any taxes. I have the all-time greatest real estate deductions and depreciations.
I’m sorry I asked African-Americans “What do you have to lose by supporting me?” in front of a crowd of white people. I’m sorry I can never find my African-American.
I’m sorry I continue lying about my wild gesticulations mocking a disabled reporter at the failing New York Times. And I’m really sorry that Hillary’s super PAC used it in an ad and made me look like an oaf.
I’m sorry I have to sacrifice so much to make America great again. No one would believe the hatred spewed at me on Twitter. It’s amazing how much super-nasty stuff can be packed into 140 characters. Cyberbullying stinks. I’m sorry Al Gore invented the internet.
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