When losing God means losing yourself

Depending on the person, religion can be fulfilling, or it can be stifling; it can give someone purpose, or it can prevent them from feeling fulfilled (the good and the bad stuff can and do mix, of course). And the act of leaving a religion encompasses as wide a variety of experiences as religion itself. In some cases, it can be a slow fade-out, a lack of interest that over time translates to an increasing lack of participation — someone simply stops blocking out their Sunday mornings for church, for example, or finds it easier and more fun to eat without keeping kosher. In other cases, though, the decision to give up on one’s faith can be a difficult, dramatic psychological process, one that causes a person’s life and self-concept to change fundamentally.

So what makes one person’s casual life choice another’s gut-wrenching, Earth-shaking decision?

In large part, it depends what you’re leaving behind – when giving up religion also means giving up life in an insular religious community, the change can initially be emotionally jarring or even traumatic for some. Therapist Marlene Winell, author of Leaving the Fold, has coined the term Religious Trauma Syndrome, or RTS, arguing that the syndrome — which she defines as a “condition experienced by people who are struggling with leaving an authoritarian, dogmatic religion and coping with the damage of indoctrination” — ought to be considered a mental-health diagnosis in its own right.