Let no one be mistaken: Donald Trump’s candidacy is a cancer on conservatism, and it must be clearly diagnosed, excised, and discarded,” former Texas governor Rick Perry declared ten months ago. Trump’s candidacy, Perry added, represents “a toxic mix of demagoguery and mean-spiritedness and nonsense that will lead the Republican party to perdition if pursued.”

Lest you’re thrown off by the alliteration, “perdition” means eternal damnation in Hell.

Perry has since had an epiphany, selling his political soul for a seat on the Trump Train. He even says he’s open to being Trump’s running mate, which would make him a co-pilot (or co-conductor?) leading us down the tracks to Hell. (“Can I blow the whistle, Mr. Trump?”)

As Thomas More might say, “Why Rick, it profits a man nothing to give his soul for the whole world . . . but to be Donald Trump’s valet?”

Taking his words literally, Perry wants to make a deal with the devil. In this war on cancer, Perry wants to help cancer win “any way I can.”