Most states permit only married couples or unmarried individuals to adopt, and some have laws that give married couples preference in the process. And if prospective parents want to hire a surrogate to carry their child, many states similarly require that they be hitched.

Prior to the Supreme Court’s decision, the path to parenthood for gay couples was significantly more complicated. In states that prohibited same-sex marriage, couples could pursue single-parent adoption. But that allowed only one parent to be recognized legally, and children could potentially be taken away from their families in the event of the illness, death, or separation of the one legal parent. Schools, hospitals, and other institutions could also deny non-legal parents the ability to make decisions about their children.

This shaky legal footing forced same-sex parents to seek various workarounds to protect their relationships with their children. They’ve drawn up co-parenting or custody agreements and other paperwork to build a case for their parental rights, even if they wouldn’t be legally guaranteed. In 15 states and Washington, D.C., individuals can petition for “second-parent” adoption of children conceived through assisted reproduction as well as adoption. The process can be costly and time-consuming—frequently involving lawyers, criminal background checks, and a home study by a social worker—which can feel particularly invasive for new mothers and fathers who already consider themselves to be the parents of their children.