A life of pampering awaits in which we will be freed from even the most basic of decisions. We will be released from the arduous, embarrassing, and ultimately tragic quest of human mating as we know it today, for the robots will breed us selectively. Tinder 2.0 will select partners for us, and only then will we be encouraged to breed.

As pets, we won’t just be happier, better cared for and calmer, but there are health gains as well. Fed on a balanced and nutritious diet by our owners, the population of humans will also be walked regularly. The obesity crisis will be solved because we will have to fit through human flaps if we want to go inside and eat or sleep. Robots will take out insurance for our healthcare, and we will receive a standard of medical treatment as yet unknown to man.

Just as our robot owners will film us for their amusement, so they will wash and clothe us, entering the fittest and most beautiful into competitions in which our beauty and talent will be rated. This is another transition that human society will make with relative ease. I for one cannot wait for a time when I no longer have to make decisions about what to wear, and in which bathing is arranged for me. Most of us would be prepared to sacrifice the modest freedom of selecting our own hairstyles in return for a life of such elysian indulgence.