JUDNICK: My reaction is so visceral that I immediately, like you, isolate myself so I can breathe. I live with a white person and have yet to have a single conversation with them about any of this. I simply don’t trust their reaction. During the immediate protests for Michael Brown I walked in the crowd solo and mostly silent. I was able to be alone while not alone, processing the fact that while I was marching and chanting I could literally die. I am a moving target. The next night I went back with friends and as we saw very privileged, white young adults yell “hands up don’t shoot” we became so enraged that we all left. I understand their “support” but when I see that white person with their hands up my first thoughts are, “When in the hell is anybody ever gonna shoot you?!” It was a feeling that resonated with my friends.
RAWIYA: I learned several years ago that in these kinds of situations, I have to prioritize my own feelings. I don’t have time for it. If that makes nonblack friends or colleagues uncomfortable, well, then I urge them to remember that having their feelings hurt doesn’t come close to the terror of knowing that someone who looks like you is killed by police or police-acting entities every 28 hours with virtual impunity.
How do you react when you see white people and nonblack people of color actively replicating racist structures under the guise of support? How has the Internet fit into your experience over the past two weeks?
JUDNICK: The immediate supremacist reaction is to equalize everything. It’s the same jig that causes white people to say “we are all equal”—a statement that I always respond to with, “Until y’all learn rhythm and how to use spices I think not.”
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