Lean in and poop at the office, already

Public restrooms induce a certain low-level anxiety in users. There is etiquette to observe; puddles to dodge; sounds to ignore; dilemmas surrounding flushing. But the anxieties of the public restroom need not induce shame, because they are also universal. We are all at the mercy of public restrooms — supermodels, world leaders, regular gals. Shared toilets are equalizers. Sit or squat, we do it in solidarity.

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Nonetheless, the Daily Beast’s Laura Dimon (daughter of Jamie) reports that “the last office taboo for women” is “doing your business at work.” Really? …

This logic doesn’t make a lot of sense, because the workplace that requires a woman to poop right in front of a man is pretty rare. (Ally McBeal’s co-ed bathroom notwithstanding.) But since Dimon managed to find a few neurotic females terrified to the point of contortion at the prospect of pooping at work, let’s make sure we make this really clear: It is okay to poop at work. Nobody is judging you. Nobody cares. Nobody gives a shit about your shits — we’re too busy shitting in our own stalls.

Go poop in your office bathrooms, everyone. It’s what our feminist foremothers would have wanted. Every woman deserves a poop of her own.

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