True datasexuals, however, will not stop at just collecting and recording bits of data from the Web. They are obsessively driven to use a proliferating number of mobile devices and apps to make data-grooming a reality. Consider the example of Placeme, a new app that is as “scary” as it is “futuristic.” What PlaceMe does is plug into the ambient monitoring functionality of your mobile device in order to relentlessly record all of your personal data on a highly granular level. Consider a typical trip to a retail store — Placeme would be able to record everything from which door of the store you entered, to how long you spent in each aisle, to the approximate speed at which you traversed various departments. The app would also know which route you took to the store, how much you spent, and would be able to recommend the fastest way home while you’re still checking out.

Just as elements of the metrosexual movement eventually found their way into the fashion mainstream, the whole datasexual craze is starting to tip into the mainstream. All of us – not just the datasexuals of today – will soon be equipped with a breathtaking array of digital devices and sensors from “cool” companies like Apple and Nike. We will download hyper-aware apps like Placeme to our tablets and smartphones. And we will broadcast all of our data to our friends and casual acquaintances, perhaps with the help of an ambient awareness app that runs in the background of a social network like Facebook. And, if all goes according to plan, all of this obsession with data will pay off in a way that would make Calvin Klein proud: people will think you’re sexy.