Adultery is bad. Telling your spouse is worse.

(1) By disclosing your adultery, you’ll be hurting the one person you love more than anyone else in the world. Your urge to confess and beg forgiveness does not outweigh your responsibility to be kind, considerate, and to avoid inflicting pain and suffering. Confessing is cruel.

(2) It will inevitably lead to your spouse telling your children, if you have any. If they are young, this will have long-term negative effects on their behavior when they’re married. Children learn by the example set by their parents far more than by what their parents tell them is right or what their religious training teaches them is right or wrong.

(3) Revealing your adultery, especially soon after it has occurred, will increase the chances that your wife will do the same to you, motivated by a number of impulse…