It’s true that Netanyahu is an often ornery and disagreeable man — witness the condescending public lecture he gave Obama in the Oval Office earlier this year. But it’s also true that he has on occasion bent to Obama’s will, for instance by freezing West Bank settlement growth for longer periods than other prime ministers and by signaling that he’s open to dismantling some illegal outposts, which Obama and Sarkozy both wanted him to do.

So Obama’s ostensibly private commentary about Netanyahu — and the misguided reactions to it — came at a particularly inauspicious moment. The bond between Israel and the U.S. is going to be tested soon in a way that has no precedent in their 63-year relationship.

Netanyahu, and his most important adviser, Defense Minister Ehud Barak, appear to have decided that they must order an attack on Iran’s nuclear program soon, unless the U.S. decides to act on its own. Netanyahu seems to believe that Obama wouldn’t order such an attack, and the president’s bitter comment about Netanyahu can’t help but reinforce the message that the prime minister shouldn’t count on the U.S.

An Israeli attack could cause a rupture between Washington and Jerusalem. A strike could still be averted if sanctions miraculously move Iran off its current path, or if sabotage efforts are accelerated (the recent explosion at an Iranian missile depot that killed 17 members of the Revolutionary Guards is suspected to be Israel’s doing). But if an attack does occur, the Iranian response could include targeting U.S. military personnel and equipment in the Middle East — a catastrophe for everyone involved.