Possibly as a result, I began to interest the fair sex. Even at five, I found many girls to be helpful and generous, in giving me Refreshers and letting me kiss them behind the Junior Surfers Shack. It was just innocent fun, until the day Mandy Green looked into my face and said, “Joolsy Woolsy, I’ll show you mine, if you show me yours.”

I was puzzled. “Why should I do that?” I asked.

“Because it’s only fair,” she said.

“I insist you show me yours,” I countered. “I have a right to the full disclosure of yours, whatever it, or they, may be. But this does not mean you have an ipso facto nunquam delictus right to view anything of mine, because it is personal.”

“Julian,” she said. “Why are you so weird?”