One prominent Democratic lobbyist unhappy with the situation described it vividly: “It’s almost like the ugly girl that you want to call late at night — but don’t want to be seen with on a date.”

The morning-long session with House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.), Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) and top committee chairmen from both chambers may not comply with the spirit of Obama’s lobbying ban, but some Democrats say the White House has only itself to blame.

“They’re asleep at the switch,” said a former Democratic leadership aide who glanced at the spreadsheet for the dinner and panned it as “pathetic.” “They’re not really thinking about how these things look for other people.”