Confirmed: ABC to perform Barrectomy on Roseanne

It’s going to be either the greatest spinoff since Frasier or the worst idea since Valerie/The Hogan Family. ABC has confirmed that they will pick up the remnants of Roseanne, the reboot that became a surprise ratings winner until the star’s inevitable public meltdowns made her radioactive. The new show, called The Conners, will follow the lives of all the foils constructed for the star instead:

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On Thursday, the network announced that much of the cast of “Roseanne,” including John Goodman, Laurie Metcalf, Sara Gilbert, Lecy Goranson and Michael Fishman, are set to reprise their iconic roles in the new show, currently named “The Conners” as a working title.

Roseanne Barr will have no financial or creative involvement in the new series, according to the network. …

“The Conners’ stories demonstrate that families can always find common ground through conversation, laughter and love. The spinoff will continue to portray contemporary issues that are as relevant today as they were 30 years ago,” ABC shared in a statement.

Er …. maaaaaaaybe. The discussion in the latter part of the clip above discusses the likelihood of success for The Conners, and references Shelly Long’s departure from Cheers and David Jade’s ankling out of NYPD Blue as examples of previous success. However, those were structured as ensemble shows from the beginning. Roseanne in both its incarnations was built around its star, with supporting characters designed to take advantage of Barr’s comedy routines as a “domestic goddess” in its first incarnation and then her pro-Trump activism in the reboot.

That pushes this effort into Valerie/The Hogan Family territory, but the news isn’t all bad for ABC in that case. Despite having its tentpole star Valerie Harper walk out and NBC having the character killed off, The Hogan Family managed to get decent ratings out in its third and fourth seasons after Harper’s departure, even if the plot lines turned exceedingly ridiculous. They brought in another big star to replace her, though (Sandy Duncan), and relied on the likability of Duncan and the charm of its male lead, Jason Bateman, to get by. Those qualities are in short supply on Roseanne, which has never been about heartwarming comic capers.

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The big question for the rebooted reboot is what they’ll do with Roseanne’s character. If they kill her off like NBC did with Valerie, just how will they accomplish that? Allahpundit wondered about that last night:

I’m leaning toward opioids, but I’m willing to consider getting hit by a protester at a Trump rally. Just don’t let it be Duluth ….

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