Via BuzzFeed, even by the usual standards of America’s most lifelike talking-points robot, this is rote Orwellian spinbabble. I wasn’t watching CNN when it aired but apparently even the anchors found it too egregious to let it pass without comment:

Anderson Cooper's reaction to @DWSTweets' CNN performance: "That's an alternate universe."

— Jon Ralston (@RalstonReports) September 5, 2012

And so it is. In less than 60 seconds here, you’ve got four lies. One: She says the language was dropped because platforms are long and things get overlooked. True enough, they are long, but you’re kidding yourself if you think the language on Israel isn’t closely scrutinized. If the platform changed from 2008, it changed for a deliberate reason. Two: She says the platform was amended to reflect Obama’s “personal view,” which is a lie by omission. O’s personal view is what it is, but the administration’s official position on this issue is agnostic. Three: She says there was no discord on the floor. Yeah? Who were all those delegates booing then? And four: She says yes, obviously there were two-thirds in favor of adding the language. Again, eyewitnesses at the scene tell a different story. But then, this is Debbie being Debbie. Whereas other top flacks try to twist facts and shade the truth, she’ll tell you straight to your face that you didn’t just see and hear what you’ve seen and heard 20 times on cable news and YouTube this afternoon. That’s how you get to be chair of the DNC and a member of Congress instead of some no-name spokesman somewhere.

Speaking of pathological lying, here’s the inevitable climax to yesterday’s clusterfark in which DWS claimed Israel’s ambassador had criticized Republicans, then claimed that it was a conservative lie that she had ever said that, and then was humiliated when she was caught on audio saying exactly that. Time for an apology? Nope. Her operating system doesn’t include that app:

Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz (D., Fla.) told the Washington Free Beacon Wednesday evening that she will not be apologizing to Washington Examiner reporter Philip Klein after she falsely accused him of “deliberately misquoting” her.

“No, I definitely will not” offer Klein an apology, Wasserman Schultz said with a slight laugh as she was exiting an event meant to honor Center For American Freedom founder John Podesta.

Asked if she had a message for Klein, Wasserman Schultz bristled.

“I don’t,” she said.

If she’s going to sit there with a straight face and insist that everything went swimmingly during that fiasco this afternoon that’s been at the top of Drudge for hours, why bother acknowledging that she smeared both Israel’s ambassador and reporter Philip Klein? In fact, today’s nightmare on the floor is a nifty bookend to yesterday’s lie. Her whole point about what the ambassador said, allegedly, was that Israel’s security is too important to let it become a political football between Democrats and the GOP. Supposedly, there’s no daylight at all between the two parties in standing with the Jewish state. Twenty-four hours later, upwards of two-thirds of the attendees at the Democratic convention were hooting for the language recognizing Jerusalem as Israel’s capital to be rejected. Sure looks like daylight to me.

Update: Here’s a longer version of the same CNN interview, followed by Anderson Cooper’s line about Debbie Downer living in an alternate universe. Even Van Jones can’t spin it.

Update: Run away!

Democratic National Committee chiefs Debbie Wasserman Schultz and Patrick Gaspard cancelled interviews with local media outlets tonight, amid controversy surrounding the party’s decision to reintroduce “God” and “Jerusalem” to the platform…

Blair Miller of WSOC TV, ABC’s Charlotte, N.C., affiliate, also tweeted that Wasserman Schultz cancelled her interview with him, without explanation. “After my Romney intv today, we were planning to interview @DWSTweets live,” he wrote. “However, she did not show up. Her staff not answering calls.”