Reminder: You are extremely old

A viral hit to cleanse the palate via the New York Post. Alternate headline, if you prefer: “Reminder: America’s teens are extremely dumb.”

No, that’s not fair. They’ve almost got it in the clip below. It couldn’t have taken more than, let’s say, three hours before one of them tried lifting the receiver before dialing.

The classic example of 30-year-old tech making modern kids look like apes contemplating fire is the floppy disk, but increasingly I wonder how they’d do with something like the VCR. If you plopped one down in front of a tween without saying a word about what it was, would they recognize it? Would they try sticking their hands in the slot for the tape? How long would it be before they deduced from the A/V outputs on the back that it was something that connects to the TV? Would they analogize to a Blu-Ray player and conclude that it must be for playing recorded media?

Would they … know what a Blu-Ray player is?

Another fun game would be to hand the kids a smart phone and tell them to call whichever friend they like — but they have to enter the digits manually. No choosing from the “Contacts” list. How many friends’ numbers would they have committed to memory?

Anyway. We’re all old and going to die, much sooner than we think.