I know, I know. No one finds this thing more loathsome than I do, especially the strained attempts at self-deprecation by participants embarrassed by their own status-seeking (“Nerdprom!”). But there’s nothing else going on and, let’s face it, there’s bound to be some joke in Obama’s speech that makes the news tomorrow. So here’s your chance to critique him, and them, as it happens. I believe CNN is carrying the whole evening live, starting at 7 p.m. with the, ahem, red carpet. If I’m wrong about that, try C-SPAN. Those with strong stomachs might want to check in periodically with the Twitter “nerdprom” feed too, where interesting gossip occasionally floats through the sea of journalistic self-regard. Fun fact: The NYT skips this thing every year because it doesn’t want to seem too cozy with the people it’s covering. Little late for that, kids.

If you’re watching, be on the lookout for the reception given to Jay Leno. One cute thing about lefty “nerds” is that, while they’d never admit it, they fancy themselves hip in an Enlightened sort of way, and Leno, of course, is the least hip comic this side of Milton Berle. Not only that but he’s the villain who pushed their poor, hip, darling “Coco” from the ledge at NBC. Can a crowd that worships Jon Stewart and Colbert be content with a guy known for cutting funny headlines out of newspapers? We’ll find out.

To tide you over until then, enjoy this Onion video goof on the incestuousness of the event. Oh, and don’t bother looking for Biden anywhere this evening: He’s away in Arizona, where he’s expected to talk about … immigration. What could go wrong?