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Settlement Buries Left's Lie; Florida's Parental Rights Act Remains Unscathed

AP Photo/Wilfredo Lee

If nothing else, Monday’s announced settlement in the prolonged legal battle over Florida’s Parental Rights in Education Act clarified one vitally significant thing:

Opponents’ nickname for the statute — “Don’t Flay Whey” (or something) — was a lie from the get-go. A monumental, purposeful, preposterous lie (George Costanza notwithstanding.)

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Of course layperson lefty critics, eagerly spun up by their deep blue puppet masters, believed the legislation included the phrase “Don’t Spray Gray” (or something). Because branding.


And now, because they’re being instructed by the same indigo opinion leaders, they’re prancing a victory lap.


Well. They can believe that if they want to. Our side — I’m being presumptive, this being a place where center-right rationalists gather — regards the outcome as a victory for Gov. Ron DeSantis, who championed the legislation; the GOP-dominated Legislature, which happily did DeSantis’ bidding; Florida’s conservative activists, who helped build on Republicans’ electoral success; and at least one vindicated mainstream journalist.


Long post short, the settlement merely clarifies language in the statute opponents claimed was murky. Whether the murkiness was a bug or a feature is in the eye of the beholder; no doubt the stalwarts among Florida’s Moms for Liberty were rightly pleased the act laid an invisible third rail through Sunshine State classrooms.

Anyway, going forward, the state has stipulated that stuff that wasn’t within the scope of the law remains outside the scope of the law. That’s the settlement. No more, no less.

With the settlement, the law — expanded last year to encompass all public school grade levels — will remain in effect. In its purview, the legislation prohibits classroom instruction about sexual orientation or gender identity, mandates that parents are notified about healthcare services offered at the school, with the right to decline, and requires that whenever a questionnaire or health screening is given to K–3 students, parents receive it first and provide permission for the school to administer the questionnaire or health screening to their child.

“Their judicial activism has failed,” a DeSantis press release stated. “Today’s mutually agreed settlement ensures that the law will remain in effect and it is expected that the case will be dismissed by the Court imminently.”

So, where are we? Simply put, it’s too early to tell. The proof will be in the implementation of these “clarifications.” Books that weren’t banned from libraries in the first place will be welcomed back. Discussions about sexual orientation that emerge organically won’t cross the line, but still — from the sounds of it — cannot be led by teachers, other district personnel, or guest speakers.

So, one guesses, even with the clarification, this won’t happen in Florida public schools.


Bottom line: That horrendous lie of a nickname is dead, gone with the signing of the settlement and the clerk of the court’s seal. Won’t Slay Clay (or something) is dust.

All the while, the Legislature was readying more anti-woke ammo for the governor’s desk. Last week, lawmakers passed a bill prohibiting courses in identity politics and systemic racism from being mandated in teacher preparation courses. Settlements and (possibly meaningless) clarifications notwithstanding, when it comes to opposing indoctrination to the darling theories of the left, in Florida at least, the beat goes on.

As it should.



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